FUN FACT: Did you know that if Saint Valentine was alive today he’d be a ZOMBIE!? True!*
I’m a romantic. I’m sure that comes as no surprise based on my body of classically inspired romantic art-styled works. And yet I feel itÂ necessaryÂ to confess to you all, as the greatest of allÂ Hallmark holidays approaches -Â so that you may all be encouraged to stand up and confess your unhealthy infatuation with those who you stalk from afar.**
So, with that said – Â in honor of the 1,515th Valentine’s Day, and cheap bastards everywhere, I present to you a gift from mine own hands – NAY! From my hearty place! … use it wisely!
**People on the internet ‘stalk’ people, right? I’m pretty sure this is a fact now – feel free to email and contest, but I’m pretty sure you’re wrong, you sick pathetic ‘stalker’
***Some assembly required. And computery knowledge.